Wednesday, December 10, 2008

The Law of Hentai, it does exist!

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Found this when browsing thru some eroero site, I recall I read the law of anime years ago when I start my otaku career, lol. And note that I don't give a damn about filtering anymore, so, yeah, go ahead and read it or go away and read something else;


The Law of Hentai


01. If there are two characters who like each other, they will have sex.
02. If there are two characters who hate each other, they will have sex.
03. If there are two characters who, in a million years, would NEVER have sex, they will have sex.
04. If there are two characters who have repressed feelings for each other, they will suddenly realize the other loves them And then have sex.
05. If a seemingly unimportant character is brought to attention for a significant time, they will have sex.
06. If there is a catgirl in the series, she will have sex.
07. If there is a vampire in the series, she will have sex.
08. If there is a (insert anything here) in the series, she will have sex.
09. If there is a character in the series who has a mom, she will have sex
10. If there is a character in the series who has a sister, she will have sex
11. If there is a character in the series who has a big sister, she will have sex
12. If there is a character in the series who has a sister-in-law , she will have sex
13. If there is a character in the series who has a (insert any relation by blood or marriage here), they will have sex
14. If there is a quiet, shy character in the series, she will first observe the sexual act. And then have sex.
15. However, if the shy character is a boy, he will have a large penis.
16. Actually, all boys will have a large penis.
17. If there's a character who masturbate in a closed room, he/she will forget to lock the door
18. If there is a boy who is masturbating, he will be caught by a girl, the girl will then punish him. By having sex
19. If there is a girl who is masturbating, she will be caught by a boy. The girl will be angry at first, and then have sex.
20. If another girl walks in on two characters having sex, they will have a threesome.
21. If there are multiple male characters (they don't have to have names) they will gangrape a girl.
22. If multiple male characters gangrape a girl, she will enjoy it and become a sex toy.
23. All girls will be virgins.
24. If there's a girl who isn't virgin then she must be someone's else wife, or the main character's mom.
25. All the husband in Japan are stupid because they left their wife alone unsatisfied.
26. All girls who are virgins will think their male counterpart's penis is "the biggest they've ever seen!" Since they're virgins, this is probably true. However, it's still doesn't detract from how stupid it sounds.
27. All girls who are virgins will be experts at blowjobs, and will have no trouble putting a boy's penis in their mouth and swallowing their sperm.
28. Girls who are virgin blowjob experts who don't swallow will have the sperm shot onto their face, breasts, and/or hair.
29. Virgin girls will always give the boy a blowjob before intercourse as a way of lubricant, without realizing that their natural vaginal liquids should have been already generated.
30. There is always time for sex. The entire space-time continuum will shut down if need be, everyone will drop what they're doing until an orgasm happens.
31. If there isn't a sex scene in the first ten minutes of the first episode, don't expect more than two sex scenes in an episode.
32. STDs are a myth. Any kind of sexual disease were wiped out of existence.
33. Condoms are unnecessary, characters will only get pregnant when they choose to.
34. The breaking of the hymen will never deter the female from completing intercourse, even though it will hurt like hell
35. Virgin boys will never prematurely ejaculate
36. Virgin boys will always ejaculate more sperm than is humanly possible
37. Actually, all boys will always ejaculate more sperm than is humanly possible
38. Virgin boys will always regain an erection within the space of a few minutes. Less time is necessary if they're having sex with their true love.
39. No matter how big a penis is, it will always fit.
40. Anal sex will often occur after vaginal sex, and will never require anything more than a few strokes in the girl's vagina for lubricant.
41. Virgin girls will be in extreme pain when they first try anal sex, but will quickly orgasm from it.
42. Anal sex will always result in the boy's penis coming out sparkling clean, and often smelling of perfume.
43. Girls will always climax. Never mind if their true love is bad in bed, they will orgasm simply because he is her true love.
44. Orgasms will always be the most intense in recorded history, but only if the two having sex are true lovers.
45. If the orgasm is not the most intense in recorded history, the female will experience multiple orgasms.
46. No matter how many person having sex, they all will managed to come together at the same time.


      And finally... the most ultimate law..


  If there are ANY characters, at ANY time, ANY place, in ANY situation, THEY WILL HAVE SEX!!

#31 is very true indeed and I lol'd hard when read #33 and #44, now there must be another law for another genre out there..

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